Finding My Voice

Nah, don't worry. I'm not about to get all philosophical on you. Ha! Come on! This is me we're talking about (anyone who was on my MA course with me would surely understand).

I am still trying to get a sense of what this blog will sound like in my head so that I can better convey my message to you. I'm sure you're thinking, 'Alli, what are you talking about? It sounds like you, obviously.'

Actually, not so obviously. Finding the voice of this blog is fairly important to me because, in fact, I regularly hear things in a variety voices dependent on what the situation is - and no, I'm not demented. Allow me to demonstrate with some examples:

• Editing my dissertation: When I read it back to myself it did not sound like me reading it, it sounded like a geriatric librarian.
• When I am confused the voice inside me sounds like Renee Zellweger as Bridget Jones. Think of how she says: 'Where the f**k is the f**king tuna? This is Bridget Jones searching for tuna.' And that's what I sound like to myself, British accent and all, when I don't particularly understand something.
• When I'm in a jam I sound like a harder, louder version of my regular voice along the lines of Mr T except that I prefer to call it my 'Don't mess with me' voice.
• The telephone voice. Call me at work sometime and you'll hear a whole other me, otherwise known as what the businessworld of Britain hears. Authoritative yet polite and a strange mixture of English and Canadian accents. The telephone voice also makes an appearance when drafting business emails unless the emails are to students, then they sound more like the 'Don't mess with me' voice.
• Any history text in my head sounds like it is being presented by Niall Ferguson.
• When I am around people who I think I should be on par with but feel like I'm not living up to the challenge, the voice I hear sounds like a whiny little kid, this one has the sad misfortune of manifesting itself aloud too though. I have lately been working on trying to remedy this issue.

Now do you see my trouble in needing to find the voice? Surely I can't be the only one who has this trouble. You should take a moment to listen to yourself, you might be surprised...